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| Healing Meditation Using Creative Visualization as a Healing Meditation What does meditation feel like? |
| Heal your Heart - Love your Body - Live your Joy! Simply Stunning! A Profound and Beautiful experience 3 guided meditations on one CD. Access higher wisdom, intuition and insights. Change habits, release fears and activate healing energies. Buy now Click CD's for more info. Read what others say Sound samples and instant downloads |
This was hard for me to accept. My immediate impulse was to deny it. My conscious and rational beliefs
about myself did not want to entertain the idea that I was insecure. I am bold and brave and I will fight you
on the street. My words can be like poison arrows and I will not cry – ever. I ask for nothing and I always
give more than I take. You can rip my heart out and I will look you in the eye and spit on you. So, how can
the very core of me be working from a place of insecurity?
I am one of the coolest, calmest, most practical and accepting people I know. I rarely get stressed, I am
hardly ever depressed and I laugh a lot.
My attention was then directed to my adrenal glands. I watched as tiny little drops of adrenaline seeped
slowly and consistently from them like a leaky tap. Each drop merged into the bloodstream and travelled
throughout my body. Like acid burning holes and making tracks within me. I see the drops splashing up
against my nervous system and it looks like violin strings being pulled taunt and then released. I see the acid
drops sliding over my joints and leaving pitted marks on my bones and cartilage. I see my vitality rising and
falling, but gradually, rising less as it becomes thicker, heavier and denser.
I watch as my sluggish energy rises into my forehead. I see my third eye open and alert. It watches vigilantly,
looking behind and ahead, darting back and forth and to the sides - anticipating danger.
I see a counter, like a mental abacus. I tally debts here; always counting, always juggling finances, borrowing
here and paying back there. I am balancing books and marking calendars. I see myself as a laboratory
mouse hitting a lever to free up a pellet but the jar is never full enough. I am like The Count on Sesame
Street, always counting and the outcome always falling short. Silently and incessantly I resort to wishing,
willing and pleading; like a gambler at the racetrack whose last chance is on number three. I ponder asking
for help, just a little rescue, but of course I never would. Is that shame I see, anxiety, pride or
embarrassment? Could it be that I am unsupported? Is my survival under threat or am I in a constant state of
subliminal stress?
Stress produces adrenaline which seeps down into my body. I am exhausted and my joints are eroding.
Stress becomes fatigue and arthritis like links in a chain that makes its way back into my heart. My heart is
holding onto the erroneous belief that I am alone, a warrior without support.
I resist, I don’t want to believe this, I don’t want to deal with this and I don’t even know if this is fixable. I
think to myself, that the only true weapon I have is my strength. I need to be strong, capable, independent,
worldly and wise. This is my view of myself - these are my survival tools. I can’t accept that they may not be
real. I can’t accept that deep down I might be afraid and alone. If it is denial, then I want that denial held in
place as the only safe place left might well be that place of denial.
I relax and return my awareness to my heart. I tune back in to the microscope and kaleidoscope and
become peaceful. I watch the colours and patterns and energy waves moving gently and refreshingly through
me again.
I decide to lift the healing energy up into my throat. The energy appears to be blocked between my heart
and throat. I experience a strong blockage within the vertebra of my spine. I notice a thick, white, plastic
looking substance blocking the movement of energy. Two beams of light rise in a vee shape into the back of
my ears. There is a fluid movement as the light travels back and forth, clearing, unblocking and lighting a
passage from my spine to my ears and across the back of the lower part of my brain. I sense a pleasant
aching across my shoulders and back and know that the muscles in this area are relaxing more deeply and
tension is being released.
I feel the energy surge upward and know that this part of my body has now been released of all tension. The
energy now makes its way into my throat. I sense that my throat has been eagerly waiting for this and the
muscles instantly take up the energy and relax. There is a softness and a stretching feeling and it’s a little hard
to swallow for a moment. There is so much movement within my throat that I feel slightly gagged. I swallow
and cough and the movement becomes stronger and my throat feels clearer.
There is a dark spot in the centre of my throat and I ask what this is. The voice inside my mind answers,
“This is the crying-room”. I immediately know what this means. I haven’t cried in a long, long time. My
throat is my cut off point. I developed this skill as a young child; in fact, I still remember the day that I made
a solemn vow to myself. The vow was that if anyone hurt me, I would not allow them the satisfaction of
seeing their effect on me. If I was hurt, verbally abused, humiliated or disappointed in any way, I would
clench my teeth, set my jaw, swallow hard and close my throat so that a sob could not escape. I could set
my expression into a poker face and hold my body straight. I could look you in the eye without any
expression at all. Inside, I would cry, inside I felt like I was dying, but my throat would be clamped shut.
Sometimes this was extremely hard to do and very painful. I felt like I was strangling myself, but I would
rather choke than give anyone the satisfaction of seeing me cry.
Very rarely did I fail at this, but I do remember a few times when a slight sound did escape involuntarily or
my body would let me down by displaying a slight tremble. I would immediately correct it, but I would be
angry with myself, embarrassed and disappointed. I felt that I had somehow betrayed myself. Yes, the
crying-room, how well I knew what that meant.
As light poured into the darkness of the crying room, I felt my throat and neck muscles relax. I can’t
remember a time when my throat was completely relaxed and this felt liberating. I saw words and music rise
out from my neck and float away. I sensed my thyroid rebalanced and wondered again about my
relationship with fatigue. Could the tension in my throat have been affecting my thyroid function and further
interfering with my vitality? I wanted to explore this question further, but my attention was drawn to the
words rising from my throat.
“Speak your truth,” I saw written across my neck. “I do,” I heard myself reply. God only knows the trouble
I have encountered by speaking my truth. I have been accused of being indiscreet, insensitive,
confrontational, argumentative, self-opinionated and naïve. More than once I have been advised to, ‘Think
before you speak,” and many times it has been suggested that I should, “Get my foot out of my mouth”.
“No!” responded the voice, “Speaking your truth is about respecting and honouring yourself. It’s about
releasing an insight that may seem trivial or insignificant to you, but it might just be a powerful message to the
listener. It’s about integrity, honesty, wisdom, prophesy and clarity. It’s about you being the messenger and
the message may be medicine. If it’s in your heart to say it, then you must say it. It is not for you to translate
or interpret. Sometimes you will simply be the voice, which delivers a higher meaning. Your words can also
be like mirrors. People will know instantly if you are of integrity. The listener will trust you enough to be able
to look at and see themselves”.
“By speaking your truth, you allow others to know who you are and what motivates your thoughts, feelings,
actions and interpretations. They will find trust in you and respond by giving you their truth. Allow others to
know you by your integrity for this is your currency. When people know what currency you are dealing in,
then they know that you are the real deal”.
“Speaking your truth is also about being honest with yourself. To thine own self - be true.”
“We are all teachers, healers, prophets and messengers. Words of truth to yourself and others bring true
freedom.”
I find myself back in a space of serenity and silence and feel like I have just returned from the ‘The Great
Halls of wisdom’. I feel changed, transformed, mildly confused and vaguely aware that it will take time to
fully understand and work with this experience.
I wonder where all of this will lead. How will I release old beliefs and actualize these insights.
I feel light, peaceful, excited, free, alive and vibrant. I know that something huge and heavy has been lifted. I
have been transformed, but into what and how? Am I so different now that my life will be different too? Can
I maintain this state and if so how? Will I wake up and be permanently healed, secure, wiser or better?
Softly, and seemingly from a long way away, I hear a voice call out the word, “Yes!”
I find myself tuning back into the energy waves within me and my body once again becomes awash with
light. There is a deep, deep sense of well-being flowing though me and around me. I drift lazily and
contentedly back into full consciousness.
Copyright Sonya Green
about myself did not want to entertain the idea that I was insecure. I am bold and brave and I will fight you
on the street. My words can be like poison arrows and I will not cry – ever. I ask for nothing and I always
give more than I take. You can rip my heart out and I will look you in the eye and spit on you. So, how can
the very core of me be working from a place of insecurity?
I am one of the coolest, calmest, most practical and accepting people I know. I rarely get stressed, I am
hardly ever depressed and I laugh a lot.
My attention was then directed to my adrenal glands. I watched as tiny little drops of adrenaline seeped
slowly and consistently from them like a leaky tap. Each drop merged into the bloodstream and travelled
throughout my body. Like acid burning holes and making tracks within me. I see the drops splashing up
against my nervous system and it looks like violin strings being pulled taunt and then released. I see the acid
drops sliding over my joints and leaving pitted marks on my bones and cartilage. I see my vitality rising and
falling, but gradually, rising less as it becomes thicker, heavier and denser.
I watch as my sluggish energy rises into my forehead. I see my third eye open and alert. It watches vigilantly,
looking behind and ahead, darting back and forth and to the sides - anticipating danger.
I see a counter, like a mental abacus. I tally debts here; always counting, always juggling finances, borrowing
here and paying back there. I am balancing books and marking calendars. I see myself as a laboratory
mouse hitting a lever to free up a pellet but the jar is never full enough. I am like The Count on Sesame
Street, always counting and the outcome always falling short. Silently and incessantly I resort to wishing,
willing and pleading; like a gambler at the racetrack whose last chance is on number three. I ponder asking
for help, just a little rescue, but of course I never would. Is that shame I see, anxiety, pride or
embarrassment? Could it be that I am unsupported? Is my survival under threat or am I in a constant state of
subliminal stress?
Stress produces adrenaline which seeps down into my body. I am exhausted and my joints are eroding.
Stress becomes fatigue and arthritis like links in a chain that makes its way back into my heart. My heart is
holding onto the erroneous belief that I am alone, a warrior without support.
I resist, I don’t want to believe this, I don’t want to deal with this and I don’t even know if this is fixable. I
think to myself, that the only true weapon I have is my strength. I need to be strong, capable, independent,
worldly and wise. This is my view of myself - these are my survival tools. I can’t accept that they may not be
real. I can’t accept that deep down I might be afraid and alone. If it is denial, then I want that denial held in
place as the only safe place left might well be that place of denial.
I relax and return my awareness to my heart. I tune back in to the microscope and kaleidoscope and
become peaceful. I watch the colours and patterns and energy waves moving gently and refreshingly through
me again.
I decide to lift the healing energy up into my throat. The energy appears to be blocked between my heart
and throat. I experience a strong blockage within the vertebra of my spine. I notice a thick, white, plastic
looking substance blocking the movement of energy. Two beams of light rise in a vee shape into the back of
my ears. There is a fluid movement as the light travels back and forth, clearing, unblocking and lighting a
passage from my spine to my ears and across the back of the lower part of my brain. I sense a pleasant
aching across my shoulders and back and know that the muscles in this area are relaxing more deeply and
tension is being released.
I feel the energy surge upward and know that this part of my body has now been released of all tension. The
energy now makes its way into my throat. I sense that my throat has been eagerly waiting for this and the
muscles instantly take up the energy and relax. There is a softness and a stretching feeling and it’s a little hard
to swallow for a moment. There is so much movement within my throat that I feel slightly gagged. I swallow
and cough and the movement becomes stronger and my throat feels clearer.
There is a dark spot in the centre of my throat and I ask what this is. The voice inside my mind answers,
“This is the crying-room”. I immediately know what this means. I haven’t cried in a long, long time. My
throat is my cut off point. I developed this skill as a young child; in fact, I still remember the day that I made
a solemn vow to myself. The vow was that if anyone hurt me, I would not allow them the satisfaction of
seeing their effect on me. If I was hurt, verbally abused, humiliated or disappointed in any way, I would
clench my teeth, set my jaw, swallow hard and close my throat so that a sob could not escape. I could set
my expression into a poker face and hold my body straight. I could look you in the eye without any
expression at all. Inside, I would cry, inside I felt like I was dying, but my throat would be clamped shut.
Sometimes this was extremely hard to do and very painful. I felt like I was strangling myself, but I would
rather choke than give anyone the satisfaction of seeing me cry.
Very rarely did I fail at this, but I do remember a few times when a slight sound did escape involuntarily or
my body would let me down by displaying a slight tremble. I would immediately correct it, but I would be
angry with myself, embarrassed and disappointed. I felt that I had somehow betrayed myself. Yes, the
crying-room, how well I knew what that meant.
As light poured into the darkness of the crying room, I felt my throat and neck muscles relax. I can’t
remember a time when my throat was completely relaxed and this felt liberating. I saw words and music rise
out from my neck and float away. I sensed my thyroid rebalanced and wondered again about my
relationship with fatigue. Could the tension in my throat have been affecting my thyroid function and further
interfering with my vitality? I wanted to explore this question further, but my attention was drawn to the
words rising from my throat.
“Speak your truth,” I saw written across my neck. “I do,” I heard myself reply. God only knows the trouble
I have encountered by speaking my truth. I have been accused of being indiscreet, insensitive,
confrontational, argumentative, self-opinionated and naïve. More than once I have been advised to, ‘Think
before you speak,” and many times it has been suggested that I should, “Get my foot out of my mouth”.
“No!” responded the voice, “Speaking your truth is about respecting and honouring yourself. It’s about
releasing an insight that may seem trivial or insignificant to you, but it might just be a powerful message to the
listener. It’s about integrity, honesty, wisdom, prophesy and clarity. It’s about you being the messenger and
the message may be medicine. If it’s in your heart to say it, then you must say it. It is not for you to translate
or interpret. Sometimes you will simply be the voice, which delivers a higher meaning. Your words can also
be like mirrors. People will know instantly if you are of integrity. The listener will trust you enough to be able
to look at and see themselves”.
“By speaking your truth, you allow others to know who you are and what motivates your thoughts, feelings,
actions and interpretations. They will find trust in you and respond by giving you their truth. Allow others to
know you by your integrity for this is your currency. When people know what currency you are dealing in,
then they know that you are the real deal”.
“Speaking your truth is also about being honest with yourself. To thine own self - be true.”
“We are all teachers, healers, prophets and messengers. Words of truth to yourself and others bring true
freedom.”
I find myself back in a space of serenity and silence and feel like I have just returned from the ‘The Great
Halls of wisdom’. I feel changed, transformed, mildly confused and vaguely aware that it will take time to
fully understand and work with this experience.
I wonder where all of this will lead. How will I release old beliefs and actualize these insights.
I feel light, peaceful, excited, free, alive and vibrant. I know that something huge and heavy has been lifted. I
have been transformed, but into what and how? Am I so different now that my life will be different too? Can
I maintain this state and if so how? Will I wake up and be permanently healed, secure, wiser or better?
Softly, and seemingly from a long way away, I hear a voice call out the word, “Yes!”
I find myself tuning back into the energy waves within me and my body once again becomes awash with
light. There is a deep, deep sense of well-being flowing though me and around me. I drift lazily and
contentedly back into full consciousness.
Copyright Sonya Green
| Heal your Heart, Love your Body and Live your Joy! Now available in paperback. Click the book cover to find out more. Paypal secure payment. |
Healing Meditation – An Inside View ...cont
I was mentally scanning my body and it was a mass of vibrating, pulsating, free
moving atoms. The inside of my body looked like the galaxy when viewed from
a powerful telescope on a clear night. I noticed everything moving freely and
lightly, but then became aware that around my left knee there was a sluggishness
and darkness. I wanted to direct light into the knee area but found that I could
not will my energy there. The harder I tried to focus on my knee the stronger my
heart reacted. I tried again and once more my heart responded by drawing my
attention back into the heart area.
I asked my mind to explain what this was about and I sensed/heard, “All healing
is initiated from the heart”. It was further explained that all disease or dis-ease
originates in the heart. All disease is made up of physical, emotional,
psychological and spiritual influences. My mind’s voice stated that the pain in my
knee was a physical manifestation of the original pain in my heart.
I was intrigued and wanted to know what this ‘original template’ of dis-ease
was. Images of past events appeared and changed like movie clips. I watched
peacefully and in a detached way as visions of many times during my life, I had
been left feeling unsupported, insecure and unprotected. I didn’t quite see the
connection so I was then shown images of myself dressed in some kind of
armour. I was holding a long and heavy sword looking around vigilantly in a
defensive and prepared way. There was a steel chest plate covering my chest
and back.
My interpretation of these images is that on a deep level within me I felt
unprotected and unsupported.
As I contemplated my life, it became crystal clear to me that I saw myself as
someone who needed to be totally self-reliant. I was unwilling or unable to ask
for or accept help from others; perhaps I truly believed that there was no help
available. I saw my rebelliousness against authority and my suspicion of other
people’s personal agendas. I felt my deep disappointment in people who had
taken from me in an underhanded way. I saw myself as small, scared and
vulnerable in a world of threatening intentions.
I also saw movie clips of myself as a strong, independent, capable and clever
person. I have a huge determination to fight fiercely for freedom, justice,
independence and truth.
I asked again how this played into the pain in my knee.
The answer came that, “The pain in the knee is the physical manifestation of
arthritis.” The arthritis is the physical outcome of a deep belief in being
unsupported and alone. It’s about security – security on the deepest level of self.
A belief that life itself is an unsafe place. I seem to have a deep belief that self-
preservation and protection is my primary objective in life.
From this came an insight into other areas of distress in my life. I saw the same
connection to many years of suffering deep fatigue and a lifetime struggle with
maintaining energy and money.
So, here it was, “Arthritis, fatigue and financial lack were all physical
manifestations of my belief that I am under threat”. It is about fear,
abandonment, insecurity and the constant need to keep myself protected and
supported.
I was mentally scanning my body and it was a mass of vibrating, pulsating, free
moving atoms. The inside of my body looked like the galaxy when viewed from
a powerful telescope on a clear night. I noticed everything moving freely and
lightly, but then became aware that around my left knee there was a sluggishness
and darkness. I wanted to direct light into the knee area but found that I could
not will my energy there. The harder I tried to focus on my knee the stronger my
heart reacted. I tried again and once more my heart responded by drawing my
attention back into the heart area.
I asked my mind to explain what this was about and I sensed/heard, “All healing
is initiated from the heart”. It was further explained that all disease or dis-ease
originates in the heart. All disease is made up of physical, emotional,
psychological and spiritual influences. My mind’s voice stated that the pain in my
knee was a physical manifestation of the original pain in my heart.
I was intrigued and wanted to know what this ‘original template’ of dis-ease
was. Images of past events appeared and changed like movie clips. I watched
peacefully and in a detached way as visions of many times during my life, I had
been left feeling unsupported, insecure and unprotected. I didn’t quite see the
connection so I was then shown images of myself dressed in some kind of
armour. I was holding a long and heavy sword looking around vigilantly in a
defensive and prepared way. There was a steel chest plate covering my chest
and back.
My interpretation of these images is that on a deep level within me I felt
unprotected and unsupported.
As I contemplated my life, it became crystal clear to me that I saw myself as
someone who needed to be totally self-reliant. I was unwilling or unable to ask
for or accept help from others; perhaps I truly believed that there was no help
available. I saw my rebelliousness against authority and my suspicion of other
people’s personal agendas. I felt my deep disappointment in people who had
taken from me in an underhanded way. I saw myself as small, scared and
vulnerable in a world of threatening intentions.
I also saw movie clips of myself as a strong, independent, capable and clever
person. I have a huge determination to fight fiercely for freedom, justice,
independence and truth.
I asked again how this played into the pain in my knee.
The answer came that, “The pain in the knee is the physical manifestation of
arthritis.” The arthritis is the physical outcome of a deep belief in being
unsupported and alone. It’s about security – security on the deepest level of self.
A belief that life itself is an unsafe place. I seem to have a deep belief that self-
preservation and protection is my primary objective in life.
From this came an insight into other areas of distress in my life. I saw the same
connection to many years of suffering deep fatigue and a lifetime struggle with
maintaining energy and money.
So, here it was, “Arthritis, fatigue and financial lack were all physical
manifestations of my belief that I am under threat”. It is about fear,
abandonment, insecurity and the constant need to keep myself protected and
supported.
| These articles are now available in paperback. Click the book cover to find out more. Paypal secure payment. |
| EBook also available for only $8 |
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someone who would benefit from visiting these pages - Trust Your Intuition and send them the link.
If you would like to copy an article to your site or blog, you are welcome to do so, but must note copyright
Sonya Green and refer to www.reinventingmyself.com
If you would like to support this site you might consider emailing in suggestions, a small donation, purchasing
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