| Heal your Heart - Love your Body - Live your Joy! Simply Stunning! A Profound and Beautiful experience 3 guided meditations on one CD. Access higher wisdom, intuition and insights. Change habits, release fears and activate healing energies. Buy now Click CD's for more info. Read what others say Sound samples and instant downloads |
Healing Meditation – An Inside View ...cont
I was mentally scanning my body and it was a mass of vibrating, pulsating, free
moving atoms. The inside of my body looked like the galaxy when viewed from a
powerful telescope on a clear night. I noticed everything moving freely and lightly,
but then became aware that around my left knee there was a sluggishness and
darkness. I wanted to direct light into the knee area but found that I could not will
my energy there. The harder I tried to focus on my knee the stronger my heart
reacted. I tried again and once more my heart responded by drawing my attention
back into the heart area.
I asked my mind to explain what this was about and I sensed/heard, “All healing is
initiated from the heart”. It was further explained that all disease or dis-ease
originates in the heart. All disease is made up of physical, emotional, psychological
and spiritual influences. My mind’s voice stated that the pain in my knee was a
physical manifestation of the original pain in my heart.
I was intrigued and wanted to know what this ‘original template’ of dis-ease was.
Images of past events appeared and changed like movie clips. I watched peacefully
and in a detached way as visions of many times during my life, I had been left
feeling unsupported, insecure and unprotected. I didn’t quite see the connection so
I was then shown images of myself dressed in some kind of armour. I was holding
a long and heavy sword looking around vigilantly in a defensive and prepared way.
There was a steel chest plate covering my chest and back.
My interpretation of these images is that on a deep level within me I felt unprotected
and unsupported.
As I contemplated my life, it became crystal clear to me that I saw myself as
someone who needed to be totally self-reliant. I was unwilling or unable to ask for
or accept help from others; perhaps I truly believed that there was no help available.
I saw my rebelliousness against authority and my suspicion of other people’s
personal agendas. I felt my deep disappointment in people who had taken from me
in an underhanded way. I saw myself as small, scared and vulnerable in a world of
threatening intentions.
I also saw movie clips of myself as a strong, independent, capable and clever
person. I have a huge determination to fight fiercely for freedom, justice,
independence and truth.
I asked again how this played into the pain in my knee.
The answer came that, “The pain in the knee is the physical manifestation of
arthritis.” The arthritis is the physical outcome of a deep belief in being unsupported
and alone. It’s about security – security on the deepest level of self. A belief that life
itself is an unsafe place. I seem to have a deep belief that self-preservation and
protection is my primary objective in life.
From this came an insight into other areas of distress in my life. I saw the same
connection to many years of suffering deep fatigue and a lifetime struggle with
maintaining energy and money.
So, here it was, “Arthritis, fatigue and financial lack were all physical manifestations
of my belief that I am under threat”. It is about fear, abandonment, insecurity and
the constant need to keep myself protected and supported.
This was hard for me to accept. My immediate impulse was to deny it. My
conscious and rational beliefs about myself did not want to entertain the idea that I
was insecure. I am bold and brave and I will fight you on the street. My words can
be like poison arrows and I will not cry – ever. I ask for nothing and I always give
more than I take. You can rip my heart out and I will look you in the eye and spit
on you. So, how can the very core of me be working from a place of insecurity?
I am one of the coolest, calmest, most practical and accepting people I know. I
rarely get stressed, I am hardly ever depressed and I laugh a lot.
My attention was then directed to my adrenal glands. I watched as tiny little drops
of adrenaline seeped slowly and consistently from them like a leaky tap. Each drop
merged into the bloodstream and travelled throughout my body. Like acid burning
holes and making tracks within me. I see the drops splashing up against my
nervous system and it looks like violin strings being pulled taunt and then released. I
see the acid drops sliding over my joints and leaving pitted marks on my bones and
cartilage. I see my vitality rising and falling, but gradually, rising less as it becomes
thicker, heavier and denser.
I watch as my sluggish energy rises into my forehead. I see my third eye open and
alert. It watches vigilantly, looking behind and ahead, darting back and forth and to
the sides - anticipating danger.
I see a counter, like a mental abacus. I tally debts here; always counting, always
juggling finances, borrowing here and paying back there. I am balancing books and
marking calendars. I see myself as a laboratory mouse hitting a lever to free up a
pellet but the jar is never full enough. I am like The Count on Sesame Street, always
counting and the outcome always falling short. Silently and incessantly I resort to
wishing, willing and pleading; like a gambler at the racetrack whose last chance is
on number three. I ponder asking for help, just a little rescue, but of course I never
would. Is that shame I see, anxiety, pride or embarrassment? Could it be that I am
unsupported? Is my survival under threat or am I in a constant state of subliminal
stress?
Stress produces adrenaline which seeps down into my body. I am exhausted and
my joints are eroding. Stress becomes fatigue and arthritis like links in a chain that
makes its way back into my heart. My heart is holding onto the erroneous belief
that I am alone, a warrior without support.
I resist, I don’t want to believe this, I don’t want to deal with this and I don’t even
know if this is fixable. I think to myself, that the only true weapon I have is my
strength. I need to be strong, capable, independent, worldly and wise. This is my
view of myself - these are my survival tools. I can’t accept that they may not be
real. I can’t accept that deep down I might be afraid and alone. If it is denial, then I
want that denial held in place as the only safe place left might well be that place of
denial.
I relax and return my awareness to my heart. I tune back in to the microscope and
kaleidoscope and become peaceful. I watch the colours and patterns and energy
waves moving gently and refreshingly through me again.
I decide to lift the healing energy up into my throat. The energy appears to be
blocked between my heart and throat. I experience a strong blockage within the
vertebra of my spine. I notice a thick, white, plastic looking substance blocking the
movement of energy. Two beams of light rise in a vee shape into the back of my
ears. There is a fluid movement as the light travels back and forth, clearing,
unblocking and lighting a passage from my spine to my ears and across the back of
the lower part of my brain. I sense a pleasant aching across my shoulders and back
and know that the muscles in this area are relaxing more deeply and tension is being
released.
I feel the energy surge upward and know that this part of my body has now been
released of all tension. The energy now makes its way into my throat. I sense that
my throat has been eagerly waiting for this and the muscles instantly take up the
energy and relax. There is a softness and a stretching feeling and it’s a little hard to
swallow for a moment. There is so much movement within my throat that I feel
slightly gagged. I swallow and cough and the movement becomes stronger and my
throat feels clearer.
There is a dark spot in the centre of my throat and I ask what this is. The voice
inside my mind answers, “This is the crying-room”. I immediately know what this
means. I haven’t cried in a long, long time. My throat is my cut off point. I
developed this skill as a young child; in fact, I still remember the day that I made a
solemn vow to myself. The vow was that if anyone hurt me, I would not allow
them the satisfaction of seeing their effect on me. If I was hurt, verbally abused,
humiliated or disappointed in any way, I would clench my teeth, set my jaw,
swallow hard and close my throat so that a sob could not escape. I could set my
expression into a poker face and hold my body straight. I could look you in the eye
without any expression at all. Inside, I would cry, inside I felt like I was dying, but
my throat would be clamped shut. Sometimes this was extremely hard to do and
very painful. I felt like I was strangling myself, but I would rather choke than give
anyone the satisfaction of seeing me cry.
Very rarely did I fail at this, but I do remember a few times when a slight sound did
escape involuntarily or my body would let me down by displaying a slight tremble. I
would immediately correct it, but I would be angry with myself, embarrassed and
disappointed. I felt that I had somehow betrayed myself. Yes, the crying-room,
how well I knew what that meant.
As light poured into the darkness of the crying room, I felt my throat and neck
muscles relax. I can’t remember a time when my throat was completely relaxed and
this felt liberating. I saw words and music rise out from my neck and float away. I
sensed my thyroid rebalanced and wondered again about my relationship with
fatigue. Could the tension in my throat have been affecting my thyroid function and
further interfering with my vitality? I wanted to explore this question further, but
my attention was drawn to the words rising from my throat.
“Speak your truth,” I saw written across my neck. “I do,” I heard myself reply.
God only knows the trouble I have encountered by speaking my truth. I have been
accused of being indiscreet, insensitive, confrontational, argumentative, self-
opinionated and naïve. More than once I have been advised to, ‘Think before you
speak,” and many times it has been suggested that I should, “Get my foot out of
my mouth”.
“No!” responded the voice, “Speaking your truth is about respecting and honouring
yourself. It’s about releasing an insight that may seem trivial or insignificant to you,
but it might just be a powerful message to the listener. It’s about integrity, honesty,
wisdom, prophesy and clarity. It’s about you being the messenger and the message
may be medicine. If it’s in your heart to say it, then you must say it. It is not for
you to translate or interpret. Sometimes you will simply be the voice, which delivers
a higher meaning. Your words can also be like mirrors. People will know instantly if
you are of integrity. The listener will trust you enough to be able to look at and see
themselves”.
“By speaking your truth, you allow others to know who you are and what
motivates your thoughts, feelings, actions and interpretations. They will find trust in
you and respond by giving you their truth. Allow others to know you by your
integrity for this is your currency. When people know what currency you are
dealing in, then they know that you are the real deal”.
“Speaking your truth is also about being honest with yourself. To thine own self -
be true.”
“We are all teachers, healers, prophets and messengers. Words of truth to yourself
and others bring true freedom.”
I find myself back in a space of serenity and silence and feel like I have just
returned from the ‘The Great Halls of wisdom’. I feel changed, transformed, mildly
confused and vaguely aware that it will take time to fully understand and work with
this experience.
I wonder where all of this will lead. How will I release old beliefs and actualize
these insights.
I feel light, peaceful, excited, free, alive and vibrant. I know that something huge
and heavy has been lifted. I have been transformed, but into what and how? Am I
so different now that my life will be different too? Can I maintain this state and if so
how? Will I wake up and be permanently healed, secure, wiser or better?
Softly, and seemingly from a long way away, I hear a voice call out the word,
“Yes!”
I find myself tuning back into the energy waves within me and my body once again
becomes awash with light. There is a deep, deep sense of well-being flowing
though me and around me. I drift lazily and contentedly back into full
consciousness.
Copyright Sonya Green
I was mentally scanning my body and it was a mass of vibrating, pulsating, free
moving atoms. The inside of my body looked like the galaxy when viewed from a
powerful telescope on a clear night. I noticed everything moving freely and lightly,
but then became aware that around my left knee there was a sluggishness and
darkness. I wanted to direct light into the knee area but found that I could not will
my energy there. The harder I tried to focus on my knee the stronger my heart
reacted. I tried again and once more my heart responded by drawing my attention
back into the heart area.
I asked my mind to explain what this was about and I sensed/heard, “All healing is
initiated from the heart”. It was further explained that all disease or dis-ease
originates in the heart. All disease is made up of physical, emotional, psychological
and spiritual influences. My mind’s voice stated that the pain in my knee was a
physical manifestation of the original pain in my heart.
I was intrigued and wanted to know what this ‘original template’ of dis-ease was.
Images of past events appeared and changed like movie clips. I watched peacefully
and in a detached way as visions of many times during my life, I had been left
feeling unsupported, insecure and unprotected. I didn’t quite see the connection so
I was then shown images of myself dressed in some kind of armour. I was holding
a long and heavy sword looking around vigilantly in a defensive and prepared way.
There was a steel chest plate covering my chest and back.
My interpretation of these images is that on a deep level within me I felt unprotected
and unsupported.
As I contemplated my life, it became crystal clear to me that I saw myself as
someone who needed to be totally self-reliant. I was unwilling or unable to ask for
or accept help from others; perhaps I truly believed that there was no help available.
I saw my rebelliousness against authority and my suspicion of other people’s
personal agendas. I felt my deep disappointment in people who had taken from me
in an underhanded way. I saw myself as small, scared and vulnerable in a world of
threatening intentions.
I also saw movie clips of myself as a strong, independent, capable and clever
person. I have a huge determination to fight fiercely for freedom, justice,
independence and truth.
I asked again how this played into the pain in my knee.
The answer came that, “The pain in the knee is the physical manifestation of
arthritis.” The arthritis is the physical outcome of a deep belief in being unsupported
and alone. It’s about security – security on the deepest level of self. A belief that life
itself is an unsafe place. I seem to have a deep belief that self-preservation and
protection is my primary objective in life.
From this came an insight into other areas of distress in my life. I saw the same
connection to many years of suffering deep fatigue and a lifetime struggle with
maintaining energy and money.
So, here it was, “Arthritis, fatigue and financial lack were all physical manifestations
of my belief that I am under threat”. It is about fear, abandonment, insecurity and
the constant need to keep myself protected and supported.
This was hard for me to accept. My immediate impulse was to deny it. My
conscious and rational beliefs about myself did not want to entertain the idea that I
was insecure. I am bold and brave and I will fight you on the street. My words can
be like poison arrows and I will not cry – ever. I ask for nothing and I always give
more than I take. You can rip my heart out and I will look you in the eye and spit
on you. So, how can the very core of me be working from a place of insecurity?
I am one of the coolest, calmest, most practical and accepting people I know. I
rarely get stressed, I am hardly ever depressed and I laugh a lot.
My attention was then directed to my adrenal glands. I watched as tiny little drops
of adrenaline seeped slowly and consistently from them like a leaky tap. Each drop
merged into the bloodstream and travelled throughout my body. Like acid burning
holes and making tracks within me. I see the drops splashing up against my
nervous system and it looks like violin strings being pulled taunt and then released. I
see the acid drops sliding over my joints and leaving pitted marks on my bones and
cartilage. I see my vitality rising and falling, but gradually, rising less as it becomes
thicker, heavier and denser.
I watch as my sluggish energy rises into my forehead. I see my third eye open and
alert. It watches vigilantly, looking behind and ahead, darting back and forth and to
the sides - anticipating danger.
I see a counter, like a mental abacus. I tally debts here; always counting, always
juggling finances, borrowing here and paying back there. I am balancing books and
marking calendars. I see myself as a laboratory mouse hitting a lever to free up a
pellet but the jar is never full enough. I am like The Count on Sesame Street, always
counting and the outcome always falling short. Silently and incessantly I resort to
wishing, willing and pleading; like a gambler at the racetrack whose last chance is
on number three. I ponder asking for help, just a little rescue, but of course I never
would. Is that shame I see, anxiety, pride or embarrassment? Could it be that I am
unsupported? Is my survival under threat or am I in a constant state of subliminal
stress?
Stress produces adrenaline which seeps down into my body. I am exhausted and
my joints are eroding. Stress becomes fatigue and arthritis like links in a chain that
makes its way back into my heart. My heart is holding onto the erroneous belief
that I am alone, a warrior without support.
I resist, I don’t want to believe this, I don’t want to deal with this and I don’t even
know if this is fixable. I think to myself, that the only true weapon I have is my
strength. I need to be strong, capable, independent, worldly and wise. This is my
view of myself - these are my survival tools. I can’t accept that they may not be
real. I can’t accept that deep down I might be afraid and alone. If it is denial, then I
want that denial held in place as the only safe place left might well be that place of
denial.
I relax and return my awareness to my heart. I tune back in to the microscope and
kaleidoscope and become peaceful. I watch the colours and patterns and energy
waves moving gently and refreshingly through me again.
I decide to lift the healing energy up into my throat. The energy appears to be
blocked between my heart and throat. I experience a strong blockage within the
vertebra of my spine. I notice a thick, white, plastic looking substance blocking the
movement of energy. Two beams of light rise in a vee shape into the back of my
ears. There is a fluid movement as the light travels back and forth, clearing,
unblocking and lighting a passage from my spine to my ears and across the back of
the lower part of my brain. I sense a pleasant aching across my shoulders and back
and know that the muscles in this area are relaxing more deeply and tension is being
released.
I feel the energy surge upward and know that this part of my body has now been
released of all tension. The energy now makes its way into my throat. I sense that
my throat has been eagerly waiting for this and the muscles instantly take up the
energy and relax. There is a softness and a stretching feeling and it’s a little hard to
swallow for a moment. There is so much movement within my throat that I feel
slightly gagged. I swallow and cough and the movement becomes stronger and my
throat feels clearer.
There is a dark spot in the centre of my throat and I ask what this is. The voice
inside my mind answers, “This is the crying-room”. I immediately know what this
means. I haven’t cried in a long, long time. My throat is my cut off point. I
developed this skill as a young child; in fact, I still remember the day that I made a
solemn vow to myself. The vow was that if anyone hurt me, I would not allow
them the satisfaction of seeing their effect on me. If I was hurt, verbally abused,
humiliated or disappointed in any way, I would clench my teeth, set my jaw,
swallow hard and close my throat so that a sob could not escape. I could set my
expression into a poker face and hold my body straight. I could look you in the eye
without any expression at all. Inside, I would cry, inside I felt like I was dying, but
my throat would be clamped shut. Sometimes this was extremely hard to do and
very painful. I felt like I was strangling myself, but I would rather choke than give
anyone the satisfaction of seeing me cry.
Very rarely did I fail at this, but I do remember a few times when a slight sound did
escape involuntarily or my body would let me down by displaying a slight tremble. I
would immediately correct it, but I would be angry with myself, embarrassed and
disappointed. I felt that I had somehow betrayed myself. Yes, the crying-room,
how well I knew what that meant.
As light poured into the darkness of the crying room, I felt my throat and neck
muscles relax. I can’t remember a time when my throat was completely relaxed and
this felt liberating. I saw words and music rise out from my neck and float away. I
sensed my thyroid rebalanced and wondered again about my relationship with
fatigue. Could the tension in my throat have been affecting my thyroid function and
further interfering with my vitality? I wanted to explore this question further, but
my attention was drawn to the words rising from my throat.
“Speak your truth,” I saw written across my neck. “I do,” I heard myself reply.
God only knows the trouble I have encountered by speaking my truth. I have been
accused of being indiscreet, insensitive, confrontational, argumentative, self-
opinionated and naïve. More than once I have been advised to, ‘Think before you
speak,” and many times it has been suggested that I should, “Get my foot out of
my mouth”.
“No!” responded the voice, “Speaking your truth is about respecting and honouring
yourself. It’s about releasing an insight that may seem trivial or insignificant to you,
but it might just be a powerful message to the listener. It’s about integrity, honesty,
wisdom, prophesy and clarity. It’s about you being the messenger and the message
may be medicine. If it’s in your heart to say it, then you must say it. It is not for
you to translate or interpret. Sometimes you will simply be the voice, which delivers
a higher meaning. Your words can also be like mirrors. People will know instantly if
you are of integrity. The listener will trust you enough to be able to look at and see
themselves”.
“By speaking your truth, you allow others to know who you are and what
motivates your thoughts, feelings, actions and interpretations. They will find trust in
you and respond by giving you their truth. Allow others to know you by your
integrity for this is your currency. When people know what currency you are
dealing in, then they know that you are the real deal”.
“Speaking your truth is also about being honest with yourself. To thine own self -
be true.”
“We are all teachers, healers, prophets and messengers. Words of truth to yourself
and others bring true freedom.”
I find myself back in a space of serenity and silence and feel like I have just
returned from the ‘The Great Halls of wisdom’. I feel changed, transformed, mildly
confused and vaguely aware that it will take time to fully understand and work with
this experience.
I wonder where all of this will lead. How will I release old beliefs and actualize
these insights.
I feel light, peaceful, excited, free, alive and vibrant. I know that something huge
and heavy has been lifted. I have been transformed, but into what and how? Am I
so different now that my life will be different too? Can I maintain this state and if so
how? Will I wake up and be permanently healed, secure, wiser or better?
Softly, and seemingly from a long way away, I hear a voice call out the word,
“Yes!”
I find myself tuning back into the energy waves within me and my body once again
becomes awash with light. There is a deep, deep sense of well-being flowing
though me and around me. I drift lazily and contentedly back into full
consciousness.
Copyright Sonya Green
| Healing Meditation Using Creative Visualization as a Healing Meditation What does meditation feel like? |
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| Heal your Heart, Love your Body and Live your Joy! Now available in paperback. Click the book cover to find out more. Paypal secure payment. |
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